Wifey and me

Sometimes the best pictures remain undated.

I really can't be sure as to when this photo was taken. It could be as recently as 2005, as long ago as 1995. Hopefully, the former date is correct.

I have the most lovely wife. As I read the Psalms during the pandemic, I see Dena in all the virtues extolled of a good wife, and all the things that a husband can value.

Thirty years. That anniversary is fast approaching. It has been a wonderful experience, being married to Dena. We have lived in several places, worked different jobs, raised two wonderful daughters, built or bought new homes several times, enjoyed travel to Europe, and gathered memories, primarily of the four of us, living a blessed life.

In these times, it is especially moving to reflect on all of life's blessings, from my own wonderful parents, to now being close to Dena's loving, patient and supportive parents. These two sets of parents -- first Paige and Ed, and now Abe and Jane -- form the bookends as well as the foundation for my life, my family, and my opportunities and successes in life.

My parents were quintessential Greatest Generation stock: They both climbed up from a tough life, through the Great Depression and World War II, and into the post-war challenges of the cold war, polio, racial strife, college student rebellions, the decline of the industrial base, and the challenges of the new cultural norms, as the influence of religion declined and the influence of the entertainment and celebrity world -- in many ways -- replaced 'traditional' American values of faith and family.

Thirty years ago, our 'heroes' were primarily the entire generation of men of World War II. Twenty years ago, they were the 'first responders' on 9/11, the firemen and policemen, many of whom died that day, some of them years later. Now the 'heroes' are on a different battle line -- the Covid-19 battle -- where the doctors and nurses are on the front line and all of the support people -- the truckers, the grocers, the hospital support staff -- back them up directly.

My parents remain my heroes. They were not just part of the Greatest Generation, they were the foundation for the opportunities provided to my generation. I am sure that mom and, especially, dad, would be very unhappy at how these opportunities have been wasted, how the public education system has become a shambles, how politicians grow rich and powerful at the expense of then poorest of the poor, how Catholics don't attend Mass much anymore, how television, movies and the mainstream media glamorize sex and violence, how people want to have government -- taxpayer -- guarantees of income, education, housing, food, healthcare, and retirement, how so many kids today grow up without two parents at home, and how 'personal responsibility,' as a term, a philosophy and a practice, has almost become an oppressive idea in the progressive society we live in today.

The greatest thing children can inherit from their parents is their parents' core values. While there is more money inherited today (primarily because over the last fifty years, wealth has been transferred to or accumulated by the older generation, while the Millennial generation piles up debt at a prodigious rate), that does not mean that Millennials can rest, waiting to inherit their grandparents' fortunes, unless those same Millennials adopt some of the basics of the success of their grandparents -- savings over debt, investment over frivolous expense, family over the profligate nature of single life -- whatever fortune the Millennials do acquire will be spent quickly, and most Millennials will not inherit a much if anything from their parents or their grandparents.

So my blessings and gratitude stem primarily from my parents, the good habits that they taught me, and the 'good' choices I have made, based on those values. My doctorate is mostly the result of the emphasis on meaningful education that my parents promoted, and making the choice to pursue a doctorate in a more practical, lucrative, and stimulating field, than just staying in school to accumulate. Investing in my career after Penn State for twelve years made me a better teacher, better person, and better potential husband, and that led me to the next important choice: marrying Dena.

In my next post, I plan to expand upon those last thirty years and to acknowledge the role that Jane and Abe have played in making these past thirty years so fulfilling, so rewarding -- so awesome!